Just.

In case you haven't noticed, i am fucking in love with you.

This image does not associate with my statement above.

Is a lightbulb with wings, if you know what i mean...

The moment.

Sometimes i don't understand myself at all, i'm not sure what i was thinking or about to think.
Do the words that came out from my mouth speak what was in my brain? I'm not sure.

These few days ive been watching movies. It's been awhile since i watch any real movies. I was seeking for something which i will never know, and movie therapy is the only way. As i was watching my third movie, Amelie it left me in a depressive feeling in the end. It was a happy ending but the last 10mins of the film just made me stuck in a melancholic state.

I guess my current state of mind pretty much related to this character. Do i rather imagine myself with someone that is absent rather than building a real relationship with people around me? Or my heart will be dry and brittle like Raymond's bone...

I just wish the moment will last a little bit longer. Just a little bit.

I'm such a coward.

Unconditional.

How should i start this. Well happy chinese new year fellows! I guess my celebration this year is pretty good regardless how many of us put on a really good poker faces (partially) to greet the relatives. Nobody is perfect even in the families. Don't get me wrong, i love hanging out with my relatives some of them i wish they stay nearer or closer as for some, let's just keep to the tradition: see you at the reunion dinner.

Since is CNY, let's talk about togetherness and family. For me, family is the only people that can give unconditional love and care for each other. No matter how stubborn or good, neurotic or dumb, defect or perfectly normal, your family will accept you as who you are. I know this because i've been through a lot with my family.

For me, my mom is the unsung hero in my family. If is not for her efforts, i dont think my family can make it this far. Thank you Mom! I guess perhaps she learned the importance of family values when she was very young. Growing up in a big family at a small 'kampung baru' (town), they were not well-off but definitely rich and full of love from the inside. My grandfather and grandmother really taught them well, even until today i can still see the great bonding among the siblings. I love all my aunties and uncles. I really do wish them well, but sadly life doest work that way.

Yes, some unfortunate events might occurred every now and then. Each time they worked their way and helped each other out like a true family. I salute the siblings, i really do respect all my aunts and uncles. Yet, shit happens. All i can do now is observe, like they says :"you're just a kid, don't interfere in adult's stuff." The thing is i am 24 this year, I feel pretty useless cause i can't help much in these kind of matters.

Everyone is struggling, yet everyone celebrated CNY happily. Well is not as lively as before (ever since my grandpa passed away) but i'm glad that the spirit is still there. These few days are pretty tough for everyone, i know. I'm just hope that with this unconditional sacrifice, the bond among the family will win again. I do, i really do hope so.

So this CNY, i am content. No i should be very happy to surround by all this awesome people. I'm very happy indeed. Appreciate what you have and spend more time with your family this CNY.

P.S Aunty (Jiu Mu) please be strong and fight all those cancer cells away!

Gong Xi Fa Cai to everyone!
May this year be an auspicious year for everyone.

Moonrise Kingdom by Wes Anderson.

How excited i am to finally watch this trailer, never thought that the main characters are two kids(from imdb).

Enjoy this amazing new-coming-soon film by Wes Anderson:

Kitty at the end!

New Year Eve anyone?

Here we are again, the last day of a year, this time around is 2011's last day.

Had a great awesome year? I hope you do, whoever is reading this.

Well, for me this year definitely full of dramas, surprises and adventures. 

I am truly happy and thankful for the year 2011. Another learning year that taught me the way of life, the real life where there always ups and downs, high or low. There will always be struggles but everything is worth it in the end. Trust me.

So the notorious 2012 is coming, as a tradition i shall write down my New Year Resolution aka the-forever-list but this time around, a little bit different:

1. Be happy.

2. To love and be loved.

3. Have a successful career.

4. Live curious (nat geo!), continue learning. 

5. Explore the wonderful world.

6. Be healthy.

A very humble list.  :)

Something to think about:

Conclusion for 2011:

I learned that i need to keep believe in myself. This is cliche but one day, yes the one day, and yea one day i will make it. When that day comes, i hope i will be able to share the joy with all my dearest.

HAPPY NEW YEAR! Have an awesome kick-ass year ahead! Cheers.